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It began on the 17th of June on a cold and blustery Sunday morning in Cape Town South Africa and ended on a sweltering hot Monday afternoon in Nairobi Kenya. It was an epic journey that covered about 6000 Kilometers. What a journey. There were so many highlights along the way that it’s hard to use a superlative to describe the experience. From the lush sun soaked wine lands of the Cape to the incredibly beautiful volcanic crater of the Ngorogoro(Ngorogoro is named by the Masai people because it resembles the sound of the bells that their cattle have hanging from their necks, cool or wha?) in Kenya. I’ve had a blast and can’t complain about a thing.

I’ve travelled through harsh unforgiving deserts where only the truly adaptable survive to the fertile plains of the rift valley where agriculture thrives. Africa is such a magnificent place and I feel privileged to have been able to make the journey to unlock all its secrets. It’s not just the landscape that makes it truly breathtaking. The people are the major actors in the play of life. I’ve met so many great people and what makes it so special is that most of these people have relatively little. I think we take it for granted so much when we see starving people on TV. It’s not our problem and we get on with our own lives. I think the global melt down will be of great benefit to us in the long term. It will bring a sense of realisation to our lives that we were lacking.

Enough of the rant you say. Well I’m finished with that now but I’ll try to recount the experiences along the way. Both good and bad and hope it’s as entertaining for you as it was for me.

I left Etosha National Park in Namibia at first light. I needed to make it back to Windhoek to drop the car back at ten which meant I had to drive the 5 hour drive without any delays. I picked up a few hitchhikers to break the monotony of the drive. A common ground for most Africans can be found by talking about the Premier league. It sure does have a global reach as most of the people I talked to were either Chelsea, United or believe it or not Arsenal supporters! They all take a great interest in all things soccer and I’ve often been asked how Roy Keane is getting on! The roads are straight and long and they stretch into the horizon with little in the way of landmarks along the way. Nevertheless the drive passed quickly enough for me because I had had an early night. I made it in four and a half hours as it turned out so at least I had the run of the day when I got to Windhoek. It was a fine day when I arrived. The mercury was hitting 30 degrees.

I settled into my hostel and found my bearings. I visited the local landmarks and went to the National history museum. It was a funny eccentric place where the displays looked like they were erected by school kids but the auld devil that looked after the place was sound. He knew his stuff and gave me a good insight into the history of Windhoek. It was a familiar scene in Namibia as in most of the other former colonized countries in Southern Africa. The revolution was swift and bloody and today the population benefit from a more human regime. To be honest Windhoek isn’t much of a city. It still has an obvious German influence but it’s nothing worth writing home about. It’s probably the dullest capital I’ve visited. Best go there to get to somewhere else! I had to get to Vic Falls again to rendezvous with the Kumuka truck anyway so it was really only a stop over. I ended up meeting some Irish though funnily enough. You can’t go anywhere anymore! We went out on the town and had a bit of craic. We were the only Mzungu’s there in the club but we held our own in the auld dance offs! This was to become a familiar theme for the rest of the trip.

With hangover under control the next morning I headed off to book my overnight bus ticket to Vic Falls. As it turned out a Kiwi and Irish lad I met over the few days in the hostel were heading the same direction so we all took the same bus. The bus trip wasn’t as bad as expected. It left Windhoek at 5 PM and landed into Livingstone in Zambia at 4 the next day. It wasn’t easy to get any sleep on the bus and it was cold as hell with the air con. We were spared the God DVD that they tend to play on these long haul trips. Apparently the Kiwi was saying that they play a continuous loop of preaching on the PA system on most of these journeys. Not to be too ironic but thank God for small mercies.

I arrived at the Zambian side of Vic Falls and grabbed a taxi to take me across the border. As it turned out I met a couple who had been on the previous trip walking across the bridge and then walked straight through the border check point without having to pay another visa entry of 55 $. Thanks Bobby for that. That paid for a few brews that night! I met my new travel companions for the trip up to Nairobi. Some of the other group were going their separate ways so we had a few drinks and swapped travel stories. It was good to catch up with the group. They were a nice bunch. I also met my new buds for the 3 weeks. It was a mixed group with Americans, Ozzies and Europeans in equal measure. A nice vibe permeated the truck and everyone was buzzin from their adrenaline bouts in and around Vic Falls. It’s a great place to throw yourself off or out of things. You can do it out of boats, planes, bridges and gorges. An adrenalin junkie’s heaven!

We had a few nights in Vic Falls to get to know each other. To trade those unwanted underpants for an equally unwanted wooden Elephant carving! It’s a mad place though and I ended up having a very close encounter with a herd of Elies. They were just off the path I was taking down to see the bridge. I’ve never been able to get so close to a more relaxed herd. It was pretty special. Still having said that I was making sure I had an exit plan. I traded most of my un wanted/ un needed stuff with the locals and to be honest I came out of the deal way behind. It was nice to think that you were helping someone out. The guy asked his boss (the wife) to come over and inspect my things to barter and I knew by the twinkle in her eye that she was getting a good deal. So if anyone goes to Vic Falls and they meet a fella with an auld Irish soccer jersey from 1980 with a fair few holes in it you’ll know who traded it with him.

Next stop was Livingstone. A town on the Zambian side of the Zambezi. We stayed there for a night and I met up with the over night bus lads. We had a good bit of craic there that night but the next morning a Cockerel started crowing at 4 in the morning. If I had a gun that night I definitely would have put my rifle practice to good use. Sleeping in a tent is hard enough at the best of times but this was above and beyond. We met some more Paddies who were travelling and doing work experience as physio’s and doctors in Zambia. It was good craic talking to people about the Listowel races and Ireland in general.

The next morning was the start of our long truck days. All in all we had some horrendously long days. We generally hit the road at six and didn’t get off the bus till after 7 in the evening. The benefits I suppose were that you had a lot of time to think and take in the scenery. We read lots of books and found out about each other. We had even the inevitable game of truth or dare and championship scrabble no less! We stopped off in random places and had impromptu games with the locals. We experience chewing on Sugar cane and spitting out the fibrous pulp, eating mealies or blackened corn on the cobs to us. I offered some of the kids strawberries and they had never tasted them before and they proceeded to spit them out! I couldn’t believe it. they thought they were too sweet! Then there were the hawkers. They descend on the truck like flies everywhere we stop selling all types of merchandise from bunches of oranges to coffee tables and drums. It’s a mad place.

We had been divided into teams as well which meant we had to interact as a team with 4 others and help each other out with cooking and stuff. We made some great dinners too which was great. It’s amazing how you can pull it together if you’re under pressure to cook for a group of 20! Our roadside lunches inevitably drew the locals. It’s mad. You can pull up at a completely random spot and within minutes you have a crowd of spectators! Most are curious to see mzungu’s (whiteys), some want money for pictures and some are just plain hungry. We always tried to give the left over’s to the kids. That’s despite the fact that the tour leader Jules would be giving out about it! Most of the kids and people along the way were really nice and innocent but sometimes you’d run into a few cowboys who weren’t shy about putting the paw out or demanding money.

I guess that sometimes you have to suffer some pain to gain and our reward was a place in Malawi called Kande beach. It was a great place. The beach was lovely and the people were great. They were all happy and the kids loved to greet you and use the English they were being taught in school. We played impromptu beach volley ball games with the locals. Played soccer until you had to energy left in the legs and then went for a dip in a really temperate lake. It was great. Our bungalows looked out on the beach and sunrise was spectacular. We went on a village tour to see how the locals live, met the local primary school headmaster. He reminded me of you Pat (well apart from the fact that he’s black and has a few extra pounds! I’ve included a picture for reference) we met the local elders while accompanied by a band of local kids who wanted to hold our hands for the whole way. It was very innocent and nice and they loved their reward of lolly pops and Sprite at the end!

The next day we had a cool surprise. We were having a spit roast in the evening. Now for all of you who don’t know what that is, it’s a game animal skewered and roasted on a spit for the day while being slowly turned. I’m sure there’s another explanation there too but we won’t go into that! I decided to go and see if I could handle an afternoon horse ride through the local fields and finishing up on the beach. I have to say that it was one of the highlights of not only this trip but of the year. I was riding a filly called Blackie and she was lovely. She was actually an ex racing filly in Zimbabwe but she had a lovely temperament. She would try to get away with a few things here and there but in general a lovely sort. We ended up riding bare back into the lake and it was class! I started to get a bit of confidence early on and by the end of the 3 hours I was galloping along the trails. I nearly fell a few times but it was great craic. I felt like Tayto from into the west at one stage. I did have a bit of a reaction about half an hour later mind you but it been worth if for the experience. I’d consider taking anti histamines in future for the buzz of it! That night we met more Paddies. A guy who’s writing an article for the Sunday Business Post about Malawi. Donal and his mot were both from the the other side of the Liffey and they were a bit snobby to be honest. I didn’t take to them but they had interesting stories to tell.

We took a peddaloe, don’t think that’s the right way to spell it but how and ever and headed out for some sundowners to an island just off the coast. It was a good laugh and we found some rocks to do some diving from. It was a cool end to the day. No heads got cracked while attempting back flips and stuff but the sail home was tough. I felt the burn in my legs from the pedaling. I did have Jess helping me though so I’d say that was partly the reason!

The characters on the bus were starting to reveal themselves. We have Charlie and Ruth from Oz and not to forget Janey, Craig and Chazzer from the UK, Jess from Lonndun, Duggie from good auld Drumcondra, Manni and Savitha from India/US, the two clean living American boys, Emily and John from Boschton, and our Kiwi cousins Kirsty and Renee. I’m sure I’ve forgotten someone but they were the leading characters. Along the way there were many beers of different strength and taste ranging from Kuche Kuche to Kilimanjaro and Safari but the best of the bunch must have been Tusker. Bleedin del ish man!

The best story about the Indian auld guy Manni (who is 71!) was when he wanted to phone his daughter in the states but couldn’t find a phone box. He proceeded to ask a local for a lend of his phone and called his daughter. He then gave the phone back and when the guy quite rightly wanted payment for credit used, Manni asked him if he could pay by credit card. A classic and we had to go and rescue him from a very irate local as you can imagine!

We left Kande beach with regret and headed for Dar es Salaam which was our staging point to hit the beaches of Zanzibar. We arrived late into the city and spend literally hours in traffic jams. It was pretty nuts. We had been on the road since six and we were still on the bus at 9 that night. There was even a stage when we had to use emergency procedures to evacuate our bladders. It involved a bucket and a blanket down the back of the bus with the music turned up really loud!

We were going to the island of Zanzibar for the next 4 days. It was a real relief to get out of the truck. It was getting really demoralizing and it was refreshing to spend some time off it. We stayed in Stone town the first night. We went on a spice tour the first day and it was really interesting and enjoyable. It makes you realize where the different spices that you so conveniently pick off the shelf actually come from. We ended up bartering for a few spices to bring home and experiment with. Hopefully the lad in the green channel in customs won’t have any issues with it! We had dinner at a locals house where they cooked us all up some very tasty dishes and served us some very unusual fruits. It was great experience. We ended up going for a sun downer in the most famous colonial hotel in Stone town called the Africa House hotel. It was another surreal experience. We walked into the bar and there was a lady dressed up in her finest with a pet monkey clinging to her shoulder. I being a smart ass told her she had accessorized well and she says thanks back to me with the strongest Dublin accent you’ll ever here. It was mad. It turns out she owns the place! We had a great chat and headed off down the markets for some famous chocolate and banana Zanzibar pizza! Another first as you can imagine. It wasn’t that bad either but I don’t think there will be a mad rush for them from Domino’s customers anytime soon!

We took a boat trip out to Changuu Island which was originally used to house criminals and slaves. It’s been converted to a hotel now and they have a collection of Aldabra tortoises. They are originally native to the Seychelles but two were given to the British governor of Zanzibar and they have now grown into a viable collection of monster tortoises. They are only a little smaller than the Galapagos island tortoises and some of them weigh up to 300 kilograms. It’s amazing to see the size of them. We were allowed to feed them Spinach. It was some sight to see a 300 Kilo tortoise making its way over to you to grab some food. We had a nice picnic on the beach after a tour of the island and then we went snorkeling. It was a great afternoon’s entertainment and it wouldn’t have been a bad place to be locked up with the views of the surrounding aqua marine water. The British used the island as a party island for the weekends and I’d say they had some parties! The island was bought in the 90’s by a French lady and she took up the lease on the island for 100 years. It’s an idyllic place and is a highly recommended trip off the island.

We headed off to the beaches on the north of the island for some chillaxin time. We ended up in a place called Kendwa Beach. It wasn’t much of a picture to look at from the outside but the resort and rooms were lovely. A nice surprise as some of the backpackers we had stayed in were kips. We hit the beach for some cocktails and the place was buzzing with life. After a massage on the beach we were all set up for a night out. We had a nice dinner and a few bevies. It was a nice finish to the day.

The next day I went for a long stroll on the beach. The sand is white and the water is a warm turquoise. It was a great place to just chill out and read a book. In the afternoon’s we played some volleyball and touch rugby on the beach.

Our next stop after another few days of long drives was to stop beside the Ngorogoro crater. It was the best experience of the tour. We travelled up close to the crater and camped for a night before entering the crater in the morning. The crater is as a result of a volcanic eruption a couple of million years ago. It’s a serene eco system and most of the animals never leave the crater. I can understand why when you enter it. It’s an amazing sight. You have rolling plains of Buffalo grass for the plains game and lush reed beds for the Hippo’s and lots of pans full of water. There are fresh rivers feeding the central plain and a vast salt bed to the west where Flamingo’s gather in their thousands. We ended up having a really cool drive seeing 4 of the big 5 and lots of other animals. We were up close and personal to a big pride of Lions and we saw Elephant’s, Cheetahs, Hyena’s and vast herds of Wildebeests. It was spectacular. All of these animals in one morning. I haven’t been in a place where we saw a bigger concentration of animals.

Our last stop before the finish of the tour was in a place called Lake Navaisha. We spent a day driving around the game park and we had some great wildlife sightings. We even came upon a group of cars parked at the end of the drive. We couldn’t get a viewing though because the cars who were there first wouldn’t move. I did catch a glimpse of my 5th Leopard tail in Africa though. Apparently the 2 Leopards were mating which I suppose added insult to injury but what can you do. That’s life and we were lucky enough to see some great sights regardless. At the end of our drive just when it was getting dark we were asked by the rangers whether we could help pull a bus out of the sand. It had gotten bogged down in the sand. We spent about half an hour pushing and pulling the car out of literally Flamingo poop! It was good craic though and we helped someone out so it was worth it. A nice Fillet steak later and some games of pool and we were all set for bed.

We stayed at Crayfish campsite which was a lovely place. Very peaceful with all the facilities you could ask for. We even got to watch the Lions game. What a disappointment that was. I was sure we had it in the bag until I saw Steyn Morne coming on as a replacement kicker. I have seen him all through the Super 14 rugby tournament over here and he was amazing. He won the title for the Blue Bulls on his own and I knew he was gonna kick that penalty. It’s disappointing because I have a ticket for the last game on the 4th of July and it’s going to be an anti climax now as the series is over.
I also had to buy some local Kenyan’s a beer which hurt nearly as much!

We got up the next morning and went for a bike ride into a national park called Hell’s gate. It was a great experience to be able to cycle into the park and view the animals from a bike’s eye view. The weather was lovely and the exercise was great. Myself Duggie and Jess rode through the park and got some cool pictures. We then stopped off at a Gorge where we walked through geo thermal springs and down along the gorge pass itself. It was amazing to see hot water spouting out of the rocks. We actually found some potatoes that people had cooked using the boiling water. The gorge had been used by Elephants and Buffalo as a migration route from the Serengeti over the ages and we hoped we weren’t going to bump into any on our walk!

We got back to camp and packed up our tents and headed for Nairobi. We had the last supper there in a restaurant called Carnivore. Ironically enough our Indian veggy mates came along and they weren’t too impressed by all the meat on skewers. We tasted lots of game meat and I’d say I didn’t do my cholesterol levels too much good by eating about 10 portions of an assortment of meats. Crocodile, Ostrich, Beef, Chicken, Pork, Lamb, Turkey, Kudu etc etc. It was a nice way to finish a tour and the great thing was that everyone got along for the most part and there was a great air of camaraderie about the group with everybody helping everybody. What a fantastic experience and I’ve forged some strong friendships along the way.


More pics to follow!

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