Buffalo Soldiers

We were out early this morning. We were on the road at just before six. It was the first misty morning we’ve had over here that we were actually out in the field. There was a very eerie feeling to the place. The mist drifted up from the ground and all around we could see the dew draped webs of millions of spiders. There wasn’t a sound from the bush initially and then the dawn chorus erupted. We could hear a vast array of birds all rejoicing the fact that they had lived through the night! Africa is a harsh place and I do not say that in jest about living through the night. We made our way West into the bush and as our eyes and ears became accustomed to the dawn we began to focus on the various fauna around us.

We used our senses and could detect a strong odour on the wind. What was it? There are so many different smells over here that it’s not easy to decipher. We act more like detectives now to figure things out and we could smell musty urine, could see spoor on the ground and hear the faint echoes of animals carried on the breeze. Then the dawn was shattered with the unmistakable sounds of Buffalo. Not just one though. This was a mass. We were in the midst of a massive herd. All around us now we could hear the sound of branches breaking and the bellowing of the Cows for their calves and the big Bulls bellowing orders.

It was an awesome sight. They came trouncing through the mist. A mass of solid Bovidae. There were literally hundreds of them. They came from all around us. We also noticed Zebra, Impala and Warthog intermittently. The Buffalo’s though were intimidating. It’s not like a herd of domesticated cattle. These guys mean business. They present a unified front. Big “Dagga Boy,” dot around the periphery of the herd while the Cows and Calves stay in the middle. We were not so much of a curiosity as a nuisance. We were parked in their way but they kept a respectable distance. It was perhaps the fact that the wind was not in our favour.

It was strange to notice that there seemed to be some kind of invisible line that they would not cross. The animals of both sexes would walk up to a certain point and turn sideways and skirt around us. They were unwilling to challenge our position. Even the big Bulls showed the same submissive behaviour. We were obviously a big stationary beast but with a human smell. We weren’t to be taken lightly and we were perceived as a threat of some description. We noticed the herd consisted of mostly healthy individuals but there were a few unhealthy looking ones too. Some were obviously suffering from some form of disease. The herds in this area are rife with TB. The problem has become so great that a disease free herd is much sought after. The statistics show that up to 80% of Buffalo in this region are carriers of TB. This also affects the predators that prey on the Buffalo. Lions in Kruger have been affected to the same extent. It eventually leads to loss of condition and death. A TB free Bull will set you back one hundred and sixty thousand Rand. That’s the equivalent of fourteen thousand Euro. That’s a big investment in any man’s language for a Cow and you certainly don’t want any Lion taking down that investment in its first few weeks!

We watched the Buffalo stream by us for well over an hour. The time seems to pass you by so quickly. We spent the best part of six hours out in the bush and it went by in the blink of an eye. Everywhere you look there are items of interest. Life is so vibrant here. Even the ants have their own story. ( I think Spielberg made it into a film!)

Sunday Bloody Sunday

Sunday

The party went on well into the night! We had partied after the sports day events closed up and nearly everyone was well hung over the next day. I always say that alcohol is the best drug ever if it wasn’t for that nasty hang over/ write off of the day after! Unfortunately you can’t just order a 3 in 1 or Domino’s over here! We passed the day chilling out and nursing our wounds. The food here of late has become next to inedible so I decided I’d hold out until the evening time and hit town for a burger or something palatable.

It was pretty hot during the day and I’m not a big fan of being out in the sun for too long so I stayed indoors and let the fan do its job. There is something inherently relaxing about a ceiling fan just spinning around in a room all day. I can’t seem to get the scene from Apocalypse Now with Martin Sheen in a hotel room in Saigon out of my head.
We headed into town later that evening for a bit of dinner but this is Africa and typical of a small town most of the places were closed. We ended up having to go to a Wimpy! I couldn’t believe there would be one here but there is! Maybe there is room for a Domino’s as well! I wouldn’t like to be the delivery driver though!

Day 44

Game day

It was all for the jersey and the pride of the parish! Well, not quite but myself and the lads did want to win the tournament scheduled for today. In fairness to the college, they had pulled out all the stops for the annual sports day. We had the pitch marked and new nets put up. They even filled in the gaping holes at one end of the pitch. We had to remove a Puff Adder from the netball court but we couldn’t pull down the tree so the girls had to play around that!

We were all set for a day of fun, passion, pride, ambition and above all else hope. There were medals to be won and we weren’t messing around! We played the first games and won convincingly with a few goals to spare and then we came to the final. The other team works in the Kruger National Park and they were certainly looking the part. They had a full set of jerseys anyway. The shorts and socks were a bonus. We didn’t even have a full set of jerseys so subs had to wear sweat soaked jerseys from a team mate. Not very hygienic and it reminded me of my early career playing outside right with Castleknock Celtic. At least back then we were given oranges at half time.

The heat was starting to get to me. It was tipping over the forty C mark and I was more inclined to stay at right back strangely enough. There was a big Marula tree casting a lovely big shadow there for me. Unfortunately I kept playing their forwards on side by standing there though and I wasn’t flavour of the month with the sweeper. We played well though. It was tough and competitive. I got a few nice belts for myself. Mind you I was putting my head into situations where my foot should have been. Some things don’t change! We had a few chances that we missed by inches and in the end there was nothing between the two teams. We had to decide the match on penalties. I volunteered and up I stepped and planted the ball in the bottom corner. One nil and the advantage with us. Up stepped the captain next and he struck it well into the top corner. We were going quite nicely thank you very much. We watched as the next lad walked up to the ball and sometimes you can tell when the person lacks the conviction. We missed that shot and the following one and the dream was over. No picture in the paper and no victory dance for the crowd. Everyone was genuinely gutted.

There are sometimes silver linings though and ours was the winning team buying us a few beers. Thanks very much lads! We ended doing what only men who have been through the heat of battle know how to do best. We got Banana’s! ( Borrowed that from Craig Kilmurray )

Day 43

I wake to the sounds of Lions roaring most mornings. Some days they are more considerate and leave the chorus until a more Godly hour like 6 AM but most of the time it’s around 4. This seems to stir the Hyaena’s into action as if it were some kind of contest and he who shouts loudest wins. We were out at 6 AM on a game drive this particular morning and we had been given clearance by Ngala the game reserve closest to the campus to use some more Northerly roads. That was great news for us as we keep hearing the Lions from the North East of the Timbavati and I reckoned that there might be a good chance that we’d see signs of them here.

We took off with my good self driving. I’ll be honest about the driving. I couldn’t be arsed. It’s funny, the other group are all fighting about the vehicle and about who wants to drive. Our group being a little bit more chilled out are fighting not to drive! The reason being that when you are driving you don’t get to see as much as when you are not. I think that some of the guys in the group could do with a bit more practice but I think overall we are all fine. I’m not aware of any of us who have actually “bought,” their license which can’t be said for the other group.

We set off on our merry way and there was definitely an air of anticipation. We hadn’t used these roads at all and we were bound to find something of interest. We hadn’t travelled far when we caught wind of a very pungent odour. It smelled like a carcass and we followed our noses. Now I’m not pertaining to the fact that we have super sensitive senses of smell now just because we’re over here but a rotting carcass does possess a unique olfactory character. As my field guide book so aptly put it, the smell was “rank.” It was a big male Buffalo that had been taken down very close to the road. We scanned the area for any potential danger and dismounted. It was funny as we surrounded the carcass. It could have been an episode of CSI. The Bull had been tackled by a number of Lions judging by the claw marks and general devastation around the carcass. The scavengers had all had their turn on the carcass as well. There were Jackal, Vulture and Hyaena spoor and evidence such as scat and feathers. It was amazing how efficiently the carcass had been cleaned. The bones were all clean as a whistle. Nothing goes to waste here and I’d imagine by this time next week there will be a lot less to look at than today. We reckoned the kill was 3-4 days old. It was only about 3 KM from the College. You wouldn’t want to be walking around at night that’s for sure.

We hopped back into the vehicle after grabbing some hooves for class and kept our course in a North Easterly direction. We were tipping away nicely when our Eagle eyed Tracker spotted movement in the undergrowth. I thought it was Lion but it was something ten times rarer. It was a Pangolin. These animals are considered to be one of the rarest sightings around. Our two instructors had only seen 3 between them in over 15 years. The more unusual aspect was the fact that these animals are generally nocturnal. We watched it’s antics. It is a really cool mammal. It’s very unusual and to be honest probably inspired characters in Star Wars films. It has a scaley look and when frightened or for defence rolls up into an impenetrable ball of scales. It’s considered in the top 5 rarest animals in Kruger so we were really lucky to have come across it. We spent a long time with it and by the time we left the clock was against us once more. We needed to get back to base for dinner so we headed back. We were delighted though with our sighting. The Lions will just have to wait…………

Day -1

Driving School Day

Who would have thought that we would all have to go back to Driving School! I mentioned all of us even if some of us have our full licenses since our teens! I received my full license when I was seventeen which is quite a while ago! Myself and “Fixer,” were up at 4 A.M. to try to be the first people in the queue. We arrived at the test centre in Mhala at 5 to be greeted by 50 or so others who had been there since 6 PM the previous evening!

The signs were ominous. My fixer told me that we would be out of there by 12.30 latest. Now I thought that this was surely an exaggeration but this is Africa folks and it didn’t turn out to be as easy as a half twelve finish. The Saints patience that I have was tested to the full. We had to form one queue after another and it was really mind numbing stuff. Time in Africa they kept telling me. It’s nothing short of a disgrace. The other people in the class had paid a hefty sum to their own fixer in a so called Driving School but this is just a way to grease palms. The corruption is unbelievable. The Driving School’s get to skip all the queues but that obviously comes at the expense of both the ordinary Joe Soap and the people who pay for the School. It’s a bit of a vicious circle.

The hilarious thing about the day was the eye test. The so called eye test is amounts to a sheet being scrawled on by a government employee. The machine I did the test on wasn’t working so when I looked up to inform the girl of this I saw that all the boxes from one to twelve had already been ticked on my binocular eye test. I my friends have 100% vision!! Another funny one I discovered was that at the bottom of the paper it states that you must take your glasses off when doing the test. Three of the girls on the course had glasses on while doing the test and all got passed even though some of them couldn’t see an Elephant if it was standing in front of them! They paid for the Driving School though! I think you can probably see where I’m going with this!

Finally after the biggest waste of time in history we received our booking date for the actual theory exam. This is only the start of the process. We then have to go to the test centre again and if we pass we will be sent out our Learners Driving License! I’m wondering whether the whole thing is worth it but unfortunately you need to get your Full License to drive any game vehicle. Lots more fun to look forward to. I think you can safely say that even with the waiting list in Ireland it’s a doddle compared to here. Ya gotta love it!

Rainy Days

We must be having a similar weather pattern as home. The weather for the last two days has been shocking. The rain continued today. I don’t mean rain in the conventional sense of the word. I suppose it’s more of a drizzle really. It suited the mood though as it’s Monday. People were certainly feeling the Monday morning blues and there was a discernable lack of atmosphere down in the canteen for brekkie.

We were in class for the day so it was pretty un eventful. I came home to find the “Special One,” chasing a Scorpion around the bathroom. He found it on his towel in the Jax. I’ll be checking my shoes from now on. The little fecker could just as easily be in my shoe and I’d probably get a nice little sting for myself! I’ll enclose a picture for your perusal.

Day 43

Today was the first day it has rained since I got here. It was Baltic by African standards and the locals were all freezing. When I say it was Baltic I mean that it was hovering around 18 degrees! The lads and ladies were going around the place with full length trench coats, gloves and hats! We were supposed to play a match as well and the lads weren’t too enthusiastic about the whole game thing. We made the decision to play eventually though after slagging them about being girls and headed over to the local pitch. Vervetedine were waiting for us at their spectacular stadium setting.

I’m only joking about that. It was the worst pitch I’ve ever seen, never mind attempted to play on. We removed more building blocks, wire, glass, broken bottles and other things that I wouldn’t mention on here off the pitch before the game. Oh and to top it off a big roll of barbed wire. We did have nets though! The pitch had massive craters in different places and God only knows how someone didn’t break a leg on it. It conjures images for some I’m sure of a field in Leitrim with a Pig’s bladder instead of a ball and big thick leather boots being worn by big thick Leitrim men!

We did pick up a few injuries between the lot of us but nothing too serious. The game actually turned out to be great craic. We beat them five nil which added to the general feeling of happiness. I wish I had brought a camera to give you an idea of the pitch. At one stage the local farmers Bullocks came hurtling across the pitch and we thought they were gonna take a few of us out. Big Long Horn cattle coming hurtling towards you with the bells around their necks ringing. Another African classic! The hilarious thing about it was that the ref didn’t even bother to stop the game for a few seconds while we chased off the offenders!

I’m glad to say we all survived that and we are all hoping to play a tournament in the College on Saturday. It was good preparation for the tournament anyway. We should do alright and we have the advantage of knowing the intricacies of our own pitch. There are a few holes in ours too! We are supposedly even getting a ball that actually has air in it. That was another comedy show in itself on Saturday. The lads having to constantly run off the pitch to pump air into the ball. This was without a valve I might add! I had to go to bed early after the game as my auld bones were aching. I’m not used to 90 minutes of running around the place after a half inflated ball.